I'm in Vegas, I have my own hotel room, I'm super horny and totally unmotivated to go find some strange ass. Eventually around 4am the tossing and turning will force me to venture out hours to late and I will invariably end up drinking Stoli/Soda's with some old asian bartender who is listening to me lie about pretty much everything.
I will end up getting so drunk I will either pass out in my make-up or manage to cab it to a sex shop where I will reccomend adult merchandise to an older, giggling couple as I battery test several toys for stregnth while asking the clerk questions about obscure adult movies. I will purchase one powerful vibe, batteries, silicone based lubricant, either an adult mag 3 pack or several books of erotica and sex advice and possibly an obscene amount of whip-is with an array of colored balloons. At this point I will stumble back to the over tipped cab driver who will deposit my grinning, chain-smoking ass back to the bright lights and early morning gambling. After the front desk reminds me which room I am staying in (I didn't forget, but at that hour the front desk people will be the only sober, fairly clean options around) I will struggle with the stupid card key then attempt to masturbate until i give up realizing that I am too depressed to bring my self to orgasm and will suffer buyers remorse as I am cramming books I will never read and yet another gently used vibe into my bags as I try to figure out if I am still drunk or simply lacking a serious hangover.
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2 comments:
I hate being bored thats why I smoke a ton of weed drink two 505mg Wired's some time three & stay up tell 6or 7 in the morning, because Im high as fuck and cant sleep, of course this goes on night after night, the only fun i have is driving really fast racing people on the street. Oh well we all die young when were having fun.
Sounds like you could use a friend.
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